Families where the husband is in the role of primary caretaker are challenged to make sure dad doesn’t become the “family” employee.
Attitudes about ownership, responsibility, and rights are significantly affected by how marital roles are determined. Did Dad become
Mr. Mom by choice or by downsizing at his company and a forced job change? I often see divorce as the eventual outcome when the woman becomes an alpha earner (earns 60% or more of the household income) out of economic necessity. Men and women approach their marital and vocational roles differently. Unless a significant change in “who does what” is carefully planned and reviewed regularly - based on MUTUAL choice - the risk of divorce is high.
If you find yourself in either of these positions create a vocational and household plan for the family. Review the plan monthly with the “entire” family - that also includes the children for their part. Neither husband nor wife may be in their “ideal” job at home or in the workplace. See a financial planner at the beginning of this changeover to get some outside financial counseling.
If resentments have built to the point of no return, a great resource addressing the financial aspects of divorce is Fair Share Divorce for Women, Second Edition. Although titled to focus on women, smart men will read it for the information is equally valuable for both sides.